February 2012
1 post
6 tags
TOO MUCH $$$$$$$ FAIL.
THINGS PRICED HIGHER THAN $11.99:
A pack of women’s shaving cartidges. ($17.99)
A stupid movie with a stupid title. ($14.99)
(Well, to be fair, $11.99 is worth more than the debut of Taylor Lautner’s abs: $9.99)
A Yankee candle. Seriously, it’s a candle. ($24.99)
Lana Del Ray’s album. Ouch. ($11.99, 2 fewer songs)
48-pack of Preparation H. Smooth shit,...
November 2010
8 posts
6 tags
MISPLACED ASS-ETS FAIL. ♥
Today, I was alarmed to read the following announcement from @JAYBUMAOM:
Out of my deep concern, I decided to make a flyer to facilitate the speedy recovery of of Mr. Park’s derriere. Please help in the search effort!
Much thanks to @JWalker_MISHBUM for the very helpful picture of Jay’s posterior! (Although, I’m not sure if announcing to the world you provided a picture of...
littlecat asked: You seem 22
Btw, I think your blog is fantastic. It's such a fun combination of news and sarcasm ~
Btw, I think your blog is fantastic. It's such a fun combination of news and sarcasm ~
7 tags
INTER-SPECIES(?) MATING FAIL. ♥
If the Michelin Man and Optimus Prime had a Korean baby…
It would look like Jay at the end of the new dENiZEN video.
I can just picture Jayzilla wreaking havoc on the streets of Seoul…
Anonymous asked: How old are you??
6 tags
MORE S&M FAIL. ♥
Sorry, I just realized these posts maybe be a little age inappropriate. SO IF YOU’RE YOUNGER THAN… 15? 16? GO AWAY. <3 (Not like you will, but at least I tried haha.)
This appeared in my feed just as I uploaded the last post. So perfectly timed.
Below, Jay Park models his very manly dominatrix boots as he spreads himself out over the sofa, gazing lustfully off to the side and...
7 tags
S&M FAIL. ♥
It seems that our Jay is rather… easy. And awfully eager to please.
BUT REMEMBER, JAY. LOVE IS A BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL THING. LOVE-MAKING AND ALL OF IT’S ASSOCIATED ACTS SHOULD BE CONSENSUAL AND NOT RUSHED. IT IS YOUR RIGHT TO SAY NO (or yes). YOUR BODY IS YOUR TEMPLE. *coughAtemplethatthousandsofgirlsgladlyworshipcough*
/end sex talk PSA
The real question: Is Timothy (AKA...
6 tags
7 tags
FACIAL FOLLICULAR FAIL. ♥
Behold, the man with the baby soft skin and infamous inability to grow significant facial hair…
…sporting an unidentifiable furry animal on his face?
…
Not gonna lie. I want to pet it. And then call an animal shelter.
Also, I thought this was pretty great:
(via lblvjp)
I really want Pringles now.
6 tags
FAN PROPOSITIONING... FAIL? ♥
A seemingly friendly Halloween message to his fans with a little more 2011 teasing…
…
Then BAM! bb brings out the DIRRTY talk. With saucy wink. Yow. *fans self*
Trust me, buddy. There are no shortage of girls who would object to you taking them down. And showing them exactly what you’re “all about”. ^_~
(For those clueless, please refer to the following video,...
October 2010
50 posts
Anonymous asked: Are you from the Bay Area?! I saw some person tag #jaycometothebay on twitter, and I think we should trend it in hopes Jay comes =D
8 tags
KOM-LB-ed (BABY SOFT LIKE EYEBROW HAIR) BROMANCE...
I apologize for the delay. And the wordiness of this particular entry. I’ve bolded the particularly bromantic part because some of you seem to really like those. Pervs.
…More to come! :D
—————————————
Ryan Higa and Wongfu Productions have teamed up to bring us a new short film from Mr. Higa’s...
6 tags
KRUNK FAIL? ♥
Jay may not be able to teach us grammar, spelling, or punctuation, but he can teach us slang. Time for a mini-lesson on the term “krunk”!
Taken from the Rap Dictionary:
To have a good time. Long as everybody get crunk in the drop — Lil Bow Wow (Bounce with me [2000].
To get crazy drunk. Originally, this term comes from the words crazy and funk. As opposed to popular...
8 tags
DISROBING FOR TWEETS WIN? ♥
감사합니다, thank yall ^ㅠ^ mournin hair lol
Gratuitous shots of his inarguably sexy back as a show of thanks for pwning the Top Trends list with “Jay Bum” are nice and all (even if I’m pretty sure it took him longer than the 5 minutes he announced to pose for it)…
But this may have set a dangerous precedent.
What happens when he gets #1 on a music show/chart?
Or maybe...
5 tags
THREE-WAY MAN-DATE WIN. ♥
JAYBUMAOM @notoriousgonzo just been recordin in LA, me, U and Q hyung gotta make some songs too man! lets do i when i get to Korea pigs’ feet get-together son!
notoriousgonzo @JAYBUMAOM haha word!!! No doubt imma prepare some beatz for it!!! See u when u get back! And get down to our get-together fo pigs’ feet, pizza, bowling & tatts!!! keke
Nothing more romantic after a...
7 tags
TOMMORROW FAIL. ♥
Giant baby mourns his aging and oh-so-decrepit body. (Yes, that is the correct usage of “mourn”.) Sensitive nuna fans everywhere were dealt blows to their age complexes.
And like all old people… he sucks with technology. \o/
No worries, Jay. Men can get better with age, like wine. Or George Clooney.
jayparksaysthedarndestthings asked: I just started a tumblr called "jayparksaysthedarndestthings". Can you promote me? Thank you :)
6 tags
CHILD CRUELTY FAIL. ♥
… I think jousting kids is illegal in our country. Might be wrong, though.
Of course, the logical alternative to assaulting children for a vlog is doing a cover. Maybe of a tender melody like Bruno Mars’ “Just The Way You Are”?
Life gives us such tough choices.
9 tags
MOTHER FAIL(ER). ♥
“No, we don’t know what you’re saying, Jay,” was a common response that I observed in response to this Facebook status.
So I thought I would offer a proper translation for you all.
Hello, how are you, my friends? Oh my, I rose at an early hour, yes sir. How amusing. Today is my mother’s birthday! We will most likely dine at KC’s Seafood Restaurant, also...
crushee-r asked: I don't think your vocabulary is even a bit too much. It's perfect for that sarcastic humor you've got going on. This isn't a question, so fail on my part :P
cathieezy asked: can you advertise this Facebook page for us <3 http://on.fb.me/9lBuMA THANK YOU :)
jayparkislove-deactivated201012 asked: hai :) tumblr is purple to support the awareness of gay teenagers committing suicide. so dont be confused :)
6 tags
MOVIE CRITIC FAIL. ♥
Very few can make an 83-word review of 5 movies seem like a long, A.D.D-driven ramble. Siskel & Ebert are shedding tears for their lost art form.
However, two thumbs up at the image of Jay in my head suffering through watching Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha gab on and on about their sex lives, shoes, and Mr. Big.
Seriously. I can just see him staring at the screen, chin in...
Anonymous asked: Omg do you mind using a simpler way of writing? ): I like your blog but sometimes I don't get what you write cos my English isn't that good!! Thanks!
Anonymous asked: hello hello :3 can you guys help advertise http://fyjayparkabs.tumblr.com/ :D
6 tags
CLASSINESS FAIL. ♥
I was tempted to Like this status just so I could have the pleasure of Un-liking it.
Yes, I am judging you, Jay.
For non-Americans unfamiliar with The Jersey Shore, I offer you this preview to get an idea of what the show is. It also might help to look up the definitions of guido and guidette.
I haven’t seen a Korean try to translate this update yet, but I did see some foreign fans...
12 tags
TMI, THE SEQUEL: REVENGE FAIL. ♥
In this chapter of the saga, we see the age-old story of vindication sought in the wake of a callous injustice committed: Hep told the world Jay likes to call him when Jay’s pooping.
And of course, Jay Park is not one to take such an offense while sitting down, especially if he’s on the can. He strikes back. Right in the groin. Literally. His oh-so-tactful sense of nuance cannot...
9 tags
TMI FAIL. ♥
When one is struggles with nature’s call and contemplates the deeper meaning of life while on the can, all alone in a cold, echoing bathroom, only the truly special individuals you hold dear come to mind.
For Jay Park, that person is Hep. And Hep should feel honored.
…
On the other hand, Jay on the potty is honestly not an image that’s ever come to mind. Thanks, Hep....
9 tags
#beatcancer WIN. ♥
Do you heart Jay’s boobies, want a couple bracelet, and/or want to do a good deed by supporting breast cancer awareness?
» KEEP A BREAST FOUNDATION «
Jay’s idea of appropriate fashion may fail, but his heart is always WIN. <3 (Corny line FTW!)
When you buy them, feel free to show them off here. <3 I have my own muahaha.
6 tags
MORE (PROMISCUOUS) BROMANCE WIN. ♥
Disclaimer: This is just the (long) product of a bored and wildly amused fangirl upon reading AOM’s barrage of tweets this morning. In the VERY slim chance one of those mentioned here is reading this, I’M SO SORRY. ^^;; heh heh… Although honestly boys, some of you were asking for it… ;P
So was it only my Twitter feed that was filled with amorous tweets among AOM members...
7 tags
KOALAS FAIL. ♥
Not only are they smelly and STD-ridden, but apparently the proper spelling of koalas is lost on self-proclaimed animal lovers who refer to themselves in the third person.
No love or luck for the marsupials, man.
6 tags
JAY'S MUSIC IS OUT ON ITUNES!
GO BUY NOW! You now have no excuse!!!
» BESTIE IN KOREAN «
» BESTIE IN ENGLISH «
» BESTIE REMIX «
» SPEECHLESS «
If you guys are good, I’ll post more later. *holds posts ransom*
Just kidding.
But seriously, go buy! No credit card? Get an iTunes giftcard with cold cash from your nearest drugstore or supermarket!
Bestie in English and...
9 tags
8 tags
6 tags
FANBOY JAY PARK WIN. ♥
It’s nice to see the tables turned for once and see Jay be the fanboy. But in all seriousness, we should all be very very VERY happy for him. No fails for Jay today. ALL HE DOES IS WIN WIN WIN.
If y’all haven’t watched the HD fancams yet… WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR LIVES? Go watch. Now. Or you fail at life. Completely.
4 tags
Watch“YOU KNOW” FAIL. ♥
@iamkathymon on Twitter reported that Jay uttered his infamous talking tic 14 times in this ~40 second clip. I verified this number myself, and it is indeed correct.
This means he says “you know” every 2.86 seconds, on average. You know?
8 tags
5 tags
cielroo asked: this blog is seriously the best thing that has ever been created in my whole life. thank you.
7 tags
FAN-MADE :: PRODUCTIVITY FAIL. PUPPIES WIN. ♥
not sure if its really relevant but i got so bored i made this hahahah
(submitted by karina)
Not terribly relevant, and I question how productively you use your time. But I do love puppies. :D
That, and you gave me a fantastic idea. I’ll save it for a rainy day (i.e., a dry spell in which Jay manages to neither fail nor win at anything in particular, most likely when he’s at...
6 tags
PARTYCHAT AD FAIL. ♥
As offended/disgusted/outraged/disapproving some might be over this ad…
It’s kinda hilarious.
They pretty much used the greasiest/느끼한 picture of Jay out there. Hello to The Asian Situation. (Seriously, Jay looks like he got hit with The Jersey Shore stick and is ready to step onto the K-Town version of the show.)
But hey, if there is one guy out there to surpass er- expectations...
5 tags
twovoxofifteen asked: This Blog.
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE<3
WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE<3
6 tags
7 tags
Anonymous asked: So I was sitting back, eating some cereal for dessert (like a boss) next to my mum.. I happened to remember this comment "Now thousands of fangirls will eat in front of their computers, pretending to have a meal with Jay. WIN." TOTALLY spat my cereal all over my mother laughing.. pure win? or pure fail?
7 tags
COMPILED WIN FAN COMMENTS, ETC. FROM THE PAST...
Win comments from YouTube:
i felt weird watching you eat. I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA SAY SOMETHING LOL
He was “speechless.” OH SNAP! Shameless plug, go buy the song here! http://music.jaypark.com/track/speechless :D
Yo J, I live in seattle off Aurora, lemme take you out to iHOP or something man, they got plates there ;)
It’s sad how easily I can imagine Jay trying and...
8 tags
BROMANCE WIN. ♥
As a horde of Singaporean fangirls rush to Marina Bay Sands Hotel to procure the golden shorts, certain questions come to mind…
What was Tony doing with Jay’s shorts? Are they that easy to get into? Does what happen in Singapore stay in Singapore?
Teehee. That was terrible of me. I apologize. OTL
5 tags
GROWN-UP SOCKS FAIL. ♥
… But seriously. HOW ADORABLE. I bet he was so proud to pose with these, too, lmao.
5 tags
YOUTUBE COMMENT FAIL. ♥
Just in case you missed his paragraph-long, punctuation-lacking, “huger” than a big whale comment the first time, he posted it twice.
Baby’s first Youtube comment. <3
8 tags
FAIL Public Service Announcement :: Bestie &...
I accidentally deleted this post. I fail.
BUT STILL. ONLY 59 CENTS!
Or as Jay and I have said before, THE FBI WILL COME AFTER YOU. O_O